Deep Space Mess

I’ve been trying to write this blog for months now. Trying to find the right words to articulate how and why I feel this way and still keep my Star Trek Nerd Card. So here it goes.

I HATE DEEP SPACE 9

There! I said it! I do not like the show.

I tired so hard to watch it several times. I even made it up to Season 3 and still…

I think it has a lot to do with Captain Cisco being such a butt to Captain Picard. Now, yall know I’m biased because I grew up with Captain Picard and I could understand if Cisco was pissed at him for something he personally did but that’s not the case.

Cisco hates Picard because when Picard was being controlled by The Borg he destroyed Cisco’s home and killed his wife. Now as a Scorpio I am very understanding when it comes to holding a grudge and I get it.

Locutus killed his wife… I get it… but Picard DID NOT! Picard would never knowingly cause that kind of harm. And I know it is difficult to separate the man from the borg when it comes to such an egregious offense.

I GET IT!

My issue isn’t with the fact that he hates Picard its with the fact that he honestly believes that this was Picard fault. He is repeatedly disrespectful to him and unfortunately the acting…. well… lets just say it leaves much to be desired.

Now, it’s totally possible that I’m just nit picking since he keeps trippin’ when Picard comes around. It’s possible that I made that whole scenario up in my head since I fell asleep during every episode.

Eitherway its been 2 years… and I still can’t get with the Deep Space Nine. It just doesn’t appeal to me.

My Precious

When I was a little girl I was raised in a very religious house. Secular music aka the Devils music was not allowed. My grandmother did not play. Every now and then certain artists would sneak in. Boyz II Men was my first secular love.

Once me, my sister and mother moved out we got a little freedom. I began listening to pop music and my choice drug was NSYNC.

I was a huge NYSNC fan. Like.. huge… like… I had posters. Saved articles, magazines covers. I owned the NSYNC board game and saved the McDonald fry container because they did a promo with Britney Spears and their pics was on it.

By the time I was a sophomore I had done 2 oil pastel drawings dedicated to NSYNC. I made one for JC and one for Justin.

I watched TRL every day and kept up on all my trivia. To this day if you ask me to name the members I always do it in the correct order: Justin, Chris, Joey, Lance and JC.

And yes that is the proper order because that order actually spells out NSYNC as declared by Justin Timberlake’s mother in some random documentary I saw

  • justiN
  • chriS
  • joeY
  • LaNce
  • jC

I convinced 4 other girls to try out for our high school’s talent show with me and dance to NSYNC’s “Dirty Pop”.

Every morning you could find us in some random foyer perfecting our performance.

We didn’t win but needless to say we were the talk of the school… for about 5 mins.

Our Junior year would see our group diminish to just 3 girls instead of 5. This was actually perfect. In my eyes the 3 of us where the true NSYNC fans and we all had rhythm.

To be fair one girl was forced to transfer (I still hate her father for taking away my best friend at the time)

With just the 3 of us we set out to show our school that even though we were fewer in numbers our passion only grew.

This year we perform a complicated chair routine to “Cry Me A River”.

I know, I know… thats Justin Not NSYNC

We went back and forth for about a month on whether or not we should dance to NSYNC’s “Girlfriend” feat. Nelly or do Justin Timberlake’s “Cry Me A River”

I even had my buddies from Choir and Theater watch and critique and give feedback on what we should do.

In the end Justin won… I can’t really say why, I think it had to do with his performance of it on GMA or whatever. There was a smoothness to CMR that Girlfriend didn’t have.

First and foremost I always give credit where credit is due and I have to pat myself on the back for this dance. Even my teachers knew I choreographed most of it. One teacher in particular pulled me to the side and told me that she was very impressed by our dance and knew that it was me who made it.

Now I am a humble performer. You will never EVER catch me saying I’m all this in a bag of chips right after a performance. I politely said it was a group effort and she caught my bluff and told me to be proud because she could tell.

And proud I was. I had taught my girls how stand on top of the backrest without falling. I showed them how to walk the chair without losing balance…. The Chair was my thing. I would go on to use that chair to audition for a Hip Hop dance team in college and man… when I say their jaws dropped… THEY DROPPPED YALL!

Can I still do it?

IDK???? Haven’t tried in 15 years…

Anywho, my obsession with NSYNC has never wavered. When I went off to college I left specific instructions for my personal bin not to be tossed or destroyed for it contained my most precious treasures… my NSYNC memorabilia.

My mother and sister honored this request until last year when I was forced to gather my old things. Things, I had forgotten and left behind. It was during this “Come get yo’ sh– before I throw it out” that my mother found my posters.

She carefully placed them in a folder and slid it in a book bag for safe keeping.

I remember showing them to my 6 yr old daughter and telling her how much they meant to me… I hoped that she would grow to love NSYNC as much as I do. Little did I know that she would nearly ruin my precious….

One day I told her to clean her room and she somehow grabbed the book bag that stored the loves of my life and threw them in the trash…

THE HORROR!!!!

I quickly grabbed them and yes I did scold her about it… not in a awful way but more of a “I’ll throw you in the trash if you ever throw MY PRECIOUS away again!” type of way.

Just kidding I was never rude about it but I did store them in the trunk of my car… there my precious is safe and close by.

My First TUF Review

Purchasing a new laptop is always a fun adventure for me. I spend hours upon hours reading specs and reviews. In the past I worked at Great Purchase so there was ample training modules provided by the Manufacturers and the company.

I’m very much aware of what I should be looking for and what I need to avoid. My training across several departments allowed me to speak confidently about laptops, appliances, home theater and why a person should invest in one brand versus another.

So due to training and my own personal needs I already determined that my first gaming laptop would come from ASUS. As huge fan of their motherboards it made sense that an ASUS gaming laptop would be a step in the right direction.

Ironically I have never owned a laptop brand that wasn’t an HP. Well thats not entirely true… a more accurate statement would be that I never owned and liked a brand that wasn’t HP.

I once purchased an AMD Lenovo and hated it with a passion

With that being said I looked for an ASUS laptop that ran on Intel. I was on a budget too so it needed to be reasonably priced. Luckily I found an amazing deal on the ASUS TUF Gaming Laptop model FX506LI-BI5N5 during Black Friday and jumped on that.

It would take 3 weeks for my laptop to arrive. And now that I’m with her I dont want to ever let her go.

DESIGN

Considering the fact that I couldn’t see it in person I was very impressed. They focused on providing a sleek modern feel tied in with a military approach to durability. This laptop looks and feels like she could take a punch and a drop or two.

Not that I ever plan on dropping her but I do have very tech curious children in the home so this is important

There’s also a beautiful thin red line that borders the outside of the screen. (Red is my favorite color).

The keys are a bit softer than I’m use to and I was a little put off by it however I quickly realized that the soft keys was a huge plus. It almost feels like I’m pushing on clouds.

The RGB effect is phenomenal! I love being able to change colors and specify the exact hue I want.

USER FRIENDLY/RESPONSIVENESS

This laptop is absolutely incredible for a new PC gamer. Now, I’m not a new PC gamer but it’s been over 10 years since I owned a laptop that could handle gaming.

Booting the laptop for the first time was an interesting experience. The screen flashed a few times and was blank for a while. I was soooo nervous. After about 5 – 7 mins the screen changed to the ASUS loading screen and I finally started the set up process.

Once done I downloaded a new ROG (Republic Of Gaming) wallpaper and my PC automatically changed my theme to match the colors in the wallpaper. This is not a new feature but very nice to have.

GRAPHICS

This particular system comes with a 10th generation Intel Core i5 processor and an NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1650 Ti graphics card. It also has 8GB RAM and 256GB SSD card.

I spent a few weeks playing with the armory and checking out games on steam. I have Sims 4, Among Us, Star Trek Online (of course) and a few other guilty pleasures that I indulge in.

The graphics on this girl is just beautiful! I can see veins, sweat bubbles, pores, skin blemishes heck I can even see blackheads with this graphics card.

Despite the fact that I loved the built in graphics I still wanted to increase my RAM. I had already purchased a 16GB RAM and a 1TB SSD card just in case I wanted to make a few upgrades.

I found detailed instructions provided by ASUS and tech enthusiasts on how to upgrade the RAM and add additional storage. I picked an afternoon where I could show my kids how its done and everything went off without a hitch.

My girl now boasts 24GB RAM and 1.256TB SSD cards. She moves so fast it’s almost as if she’s anticipating my thoughts and every move before I can execute them and I couldn’t be happier.

OVERALL

ASUS TUF Gaming Laptop: 9/10

Overall, I’m very pleased with this laptop. She’s sleek, smooth, tough and spunky. Perfect for entry level PC gaming. The only flaw I have found in the month I have had her is the fact that her fans are kinda loud AF.

To be fair I do have an RGB cooling fan under her but even when I turn that off… she’s a loud A double S beast. And honestly… I can live with that!

About That Life

I dont talk about my life in Martial Arts much. It’s listed in all of my bios but I’ve never explained what MA2D meant… Not that it’s a secret it’s just a very loooong story.

I was introduced to Martial Arts as a young girl. I dont remember how old I was but I do remember watching The Karate Kid in my grandmother’s living room and being obsessed with Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story.

I begged my mother to let me take lessons and she always said no, we couldn’t afford it. Eventually, I would stop asking and just hope that one day, when I became an adult, I would make enough money to take classes.

Now, all was not lost… she would eventually find a free class at the local park district… Unfortunately, this particular park district was in the middle of gang territory. So there was no way on God’s green earth was my mother going to let me take a bus to get there. My aunt is the one who actually convinced my mother to take me to 1 class… it was Tae Kwon Do.

This day would be the only day I ever take Tae Kwon Do.

Fast forward to High School. Still no classes. My mother tried to enroll me and my sister in a Ju Jitsu class however she could only afford to pay for 1 child so you know what that means….

Real talk…. this irked the crap outta me. My sister couldn’t care less about taking Martial Arts

My sophomore year is where my luck starts to turn. One of the security guards at my High School knew Martial Arts and started a club.

FINALLY!!!!

This unfortunately would be short lived. Not that it’s wasn’t fun, it conflicted with my vocal and theater performances so I couldn’t stay consistent.

I wouldn’t have consistent training until my final year in College.

I’ll never forget the Grand Master I studied under. He was kind and saw potential in me. He even waived my fee one month, not that I needed him to. Unfortunately the Theater would once again pull me away.

I learned a lot from that Dojo, it was oddly diverse despite being in the heart of a racist gaslighting city and the students were so welcoming. It felt like home, like a second family.

It would be this Dojo that I hold all other Dojos up to. This Dojo would forever be the gold standard in my eyes.

My final Dojo would be a free Dojo. I will admit. I was very skeptical. I thought my mom was off her rocker when she suggested I check it out.

I watched for about 1 or 2 weeks before joining. The next few years would mean blood, sweat and tears. This Dojo was the real deal. They taught Japanese phrases and part of the exam process was knowing your terminology in both English and Japanese.

This was my advantage. By then I had already taken 2 full years and was using a personal tutor so the terms were easy for me.

I eventually became confident enough that I would run warm ups and open up class as a 8th Kyu (Orange Belt in my system). I came early and stayed late. I forced the parents to bring their kids on time by being unbelievably helpful.

I competed in every tournament my Sensei brought up. I was so active that other Dojos and Sensei’s knew me by name. I was a force to be reckoned with and solidified my place amongst the Marial Artists in my division at the age of 24.

I made sure everyone knew I meant business and when I hit the mat everyone stopped to watch.

No really! My mother said that when I shouted “Kia” at one particular tournament it was so powerful that the entire gymnasium fell silent and watched me perform my Kata.

My biggest achievement was the fall right before I turned 25. There was a tournament that offered 6 foot trophies for anyone who came in 1st place. It was the only tournament still handing out 6 footers. I arrived ready and anxious. This was also my first tournament as a brown belt (the belt right before black).

Unfortunately, there were NO women competitors in the 18-29 year old division. My Sensei just looked at me and said in his Billy D Williams voice..

“Alright woman, go compete in the Men’s division. Show’em what you got”

So I obeyed. What followed would be an experience that I will never forget. And yes I will share all the details… but you’ll have to wait for it… that tournament needs its own entry.

😁

The Timeless Child

WARNING!!! MAJOR DOCTOR WHO SPOILERS. DO NOT CONTINUE IF YOU ARE CURRENTLY WATCHING OR PLAN ON WATCHING SEASON 13 OF DOCTOR WHO

Finally the answers I have been waiting for! Ever since Matt Smith’s Doctor regenerated into Peter Capaldi’s Doctor I have been wondering how they were going to explain future regenerations.

Now, I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m just now posting about Season 13 of Doctor Who considering the fact that the season finale aired Mach 2020ish. Well, the reason is simple. I DVR’d it and refused to watch it until recently.

So yes, I’m behind but its only because I didn’t want to watch season 13 and then wait 2 years for Season 14. Okay… I’m lying… the real reason it took me so long is the writing. I couldn’t stay in the story. By the time we get to the 4th episode of the 13th season I’m falling asleep just as the Judoon arrive.

I do not blame the actors. Jodie Whitaker is doing a fantastic job as the Doctor… the first female Doctor!!!! I just think that the writers are playing it safe to keep their bases a little happy despite the fact that some of their base are sexist dimwitted babbling monkeys.

Jodie Whitaker is making some serious lemonade out of the lemons they are giving her. I think some of my issue with her journey as the Doctor is the fact that she has 3 companions.

Side note… I’ve seen the New Years episode but I’m not gonna spoil it like some douchebag did to me…

For me its too much. It kinda feels like they added these extra companions to limit the amount of writing they would have to do for Jodie.

Having 1 companion has always been the norm and sometimes the Doctor will have 2 which is tolerable and depending on the pair can work really nicely. Example: Rory and Amy… I liked that. It made sense. But 3 companions… come on! Despite the fact each of them is truly amazing this isn’t Three’s Company Too.

ANYWHO

Let’s get back to the timeless child.

SPOILERS BELOW

During the season finale we discover that the Doctor is not… I repeat not… from Gallifrey! Also, she has an infinite number of regenerations!!! She discovers that a piece of her DNA is in every Gallifreyan and she doesn’t know who she really is or where she is from and this is causing an identity crisis.

All she knows (after viewing a stored memory) is that a woman found her, took her from her planet, did experiments on her and used what she learned about her to better Gallifrey. They used her talents to further their agenda and then erased her memories. Took away her history and quite possibly more than that

Hmmmmm Black people much?????

The parallels are astonishing. I’m sure the writers weren’t going for “mimic Black people in America history” but ya did. I watched her revelation and thought… whew chile‘… that cuts soooo deep.

Being taken from your home (well the timeless child wasn’t taken from her home but from in front of some dimensional thingy ma bobber), experimented on, used, lied to, memories erased. If that ain’t a descendent of American Slavery….

Looks at TV in Black History cause… yea…

And now here we are, setting up for a new Doctor after Season 14. I’m not surprised considering the tradition is 3 seasons as the Doctor before the actor quits/steps down. There are a few exceptions but for the most part this is true.

So now we speculate until the time comes. I for one have no expectations. I just hope they get their writing together cause the Timeless Child deserves so much more.

Shattered

As I sit affirming in my self pity

Traumatized by mistakes of my past

Unwillingly, unnerving and yet apologetic

Desperate for days without masks

Childish, it seems, to wish upon dreams

The power to go back and make amends

But never have I ever feels like a fantasy

No matter how deep the road ends

Neglected, protected, protested reflection

Staring down my chin with its devilish grin

The cadence unknown the beat is undone

Forever regretted yet annoyingly vetted

Your Peace

My Peace

Shattered

Drop The Cycle

I got sucked into Bling Empire!

Bling Empire was on my list of shows to binge and we have my 7 year old daughter to thank for me watching it so soon. Apparently 3 am is the best time to wake up mommy and inform her that the new reading lamp needed to be recharged.

Flames! Flames on the side of my face!

So now, fully awake, I decided to dive in head first, into the Bling, ready to fully indulge in  this reality version of “Crazy Rich Asains”

A phenomenal movie by the way… I’ve seen it no less than 10 times, no cap

I finished all 8 episodes in one night and man was it a Rollercoaster. Early on I became really attached to Kelly and early on my heart broke for her.

Her on again/off again relationship with Andrew really stuck a nerve with me. I dont care that he was the Red Ranger in Power Rangers…we all know that Black Ranger was the best anyway… he needs some serious help. He has anger issues, he is controlling, and I’m sure he’s “good inside” but baby bye.

In the words of Queen Anna ” Ain’t not D— that good.” One of the worst moments for me was when Anna took Kelly and Andrew to Paris for Kelly’s birthday. Kelly decided to let Andrew sleep in since he was experiencing jet lag and go out shopping with Anna.

Well, when Andrew woke up he was very upset that Kelly wasn’t there and he didn’t know she had left. Now, did Kelly leave him a note or a text? Idk and honestly it doesn’t matter because the results would have been the same.

I know from experience…

He called her flipping out. Raging mad and screaming like a banshee. Seeing him yelling and screaming at her like a maniac because she let him sleep in was triggering.

Hearing that he constantly needs to be reassured and that he keeps her in a room with him to “talk it out” up to 8 hours until their “issue” is resolved was also triggering.

He demands that she profess her love for him and be in complete agreement with him. He wears her down until he gets his way and she knows it and lives and can’t get out of it. Seeing her in that position brought up so many awful memories and feelings.

As a survivor I feel for her. I’ve been there. She keeps saying that the relationship is toxic and while that is true their relationship is beyond toxic it is out right abusive.

Though her situation is slightly different from the one I experienced, the cycle is the same… over affection, fight, withdrawal, submission, apologize and start over again.

The worst part of it all… is the look in his eyes when she goes back to him. It’s not a look of love or apologetic sincerity. Its the look of smug ownership, the look of “I knew you’d be back”…. a look that I have received and utterly despise.

Twice I’ve lived this… twice I have survived. It’s not easy. I wouldn’t wish that life on anyone. I just hope she sees the truth before it’s too late…

There’s A Thin Line Between Love And Hate

I will never forget waking up in the middle of the night as a teenager and turning on the TV hoping to catch an episode of Courage The Cowardly Dog and instead catching a few mins of InuYasha

I hated that show

I dont think I ever watched more than a few seconds of the show… okay… maybe I got a minute or two in but thats about it. Nothing I saw remotely interested me. Even the ending credit music made my ears bleed.

I would annoyingly check the TV guide and if it was only InuYasha or whatever anime was popular at the time coming on I would just turn the TV off and go back to bed.

I couldnt understand why anyone would watch those anime shows. It just seemed silly and unproductive. The only Anime I could enjoy was Pokémon and Yu-Gi-Oh and even that was limited.

Poor young blerdmom…. she doesn’t know any better yall

And honestly that was it. I never gave Anime the time of day. Now let’s fast forward to college.

My freshman year I took Italian. I hated it. I loved singing in Italian but speaking… not so much. I ended up with a B- that first semester and decided that I would never go back.

Towards the end of my freshman year a girl I went to high-school with suggested that we take a class together next year. We decided that we would do a new language since we were both very familiar with French and Spanish.

She suggested that we take a language that people wouldn’t expect a black woman would be able to speak. She quickly brought up Japanese and I thought, sure why not.

We signed up for the 8am Mon – Thurs class and vowed to support each other. Unfortunately she would not be able to take the class. She encouraged me to give it a try anyway and I did.

I’ll never forget that first day of class. My Sensei walked in, beautifully confident and sweet as can be. She introduced herself and explained how she would conduct class.

Along with our class we also had to go to the language lab for 1 hour a week. There we would focus on our listening and comprehensive skills. Sometimes we had assignments but for the most part it was a free for all.

I took this time to look up different shows and came across ロングベイケーシヨン (Long Vacation) starring Kimura, Takuya and Yamaguchi, Tomoko. This series would become my obsession and once I finished I thought to myself maybe… just maybe I should give other shows a chance.

I watched a few episodes of ドラえもん (Doraemon) and some other shows but they didn’t really capture me like Long Vacation.

Now, I can’t really remember what led me to watching InuYasha… I think it was one of my good friends who suggested it to me. I figured I might as well give it a go since it was a Japanese show.

I used my Netflix account to order all of the InuYasha DVDs to come to my house. At the time I was doing unlimited batches of 2 DVDS at a time.

One thing was certain… I would not watch the English dubs. No shade to our English Voice Over actors I just didn’t want to watch it in English since I was actively learning Japanese at the time.

I realized quickly that InuYasha was right up my alley. I loved the intricate world building that Takahashi, Rumiko created. Feudal Japan, Demons, Priests, the nasty old geezer (a common troupe in Japanese anime) etc. All of it was new to me and very mysterious.

I quickly fell in love with InuYasha and his journey for the Sacred Jewel Shards. I know a lot of people think about the love triangle between him, Kagome and Kikyo, and while yes I was really interested in that storyline it wasn’t what kept me in InuYasha.

I was truly invested in the depth in which the various Demons would go through to get their hands on the shards, then there’s the pure evilness behind Naraku…

I mean his origin story… whew… dark doesn’t even describe it

And Sesshoumaru’s ummmmm….self… (my husband may read this blog one day so that’s all I’m gonna say about that).

All of those things mixed together created the never wavering love I have for InuYasha, and InuYasha opened the door for Anime in my heart.

It was through Anime that I learned about myself, my joys and sorrows… my love for dark Anime (Death Note, Vampire Knight), and my desire to hear shows in their native tongue

What started out as pure hatred turned into one of the greatest past times I have. I can’t wait introduce my kids to InuYasha and Death Note. The conversations that we could have would be endless. I just really hope they like one of them. They don’t have to like both… just one…

So here I am… at the tender age of (insert how old you think I am) fully in love with Anime, married with children hoping and praying that they love Anime as well and so glad that I decided to cross that thin line.

The Route Less Traveled

My journey into Animal Crossings: New Horizons started like everyone else stuck in quarantine who didn’t own a switch before March… desperately searching and cursing those resellers.

The day I got the money to buy the switch was the day that they were listed as sold out everywhere… talk about poor timing

I searched and waited for 3 months to secure the grey one with better battery life and I couldn’t be happier.

Because I am who I am I already had a Nintendo account with my preferred gamertag secured ages ago… BlerdMom…

Yes, all gaming platforms have me listed as BlerdMom!

The first game I bought was Animal Crossings. I already knew I wanted it since I’ve been a huge AC fan since the original Game Cube version but what I didn’t know was how addicted I’d become.

The first thing I did was set 1 important rule…. NO TIME TRAVEL

I know, I know! Everyone’s doing it, it makes it go by faster, you can get cool things you missed out on… blah blah

I get why people time travel, I just don’t want to. I want to play this game the way it was meant to be played. Slow and steady. While most folks are done with their islands I’m still terraforming.

I only have a quarter of my island done and that’s okay. I’m fine taking the long route… it makes me proud.

Plus I can use all the finished islands that I come across for inspiration!

It’s Just A Movie…

I’ve been sitting on this post for a few months. Debating on whether or not I wanted to open this can of worms or just leave it out to dry. I’m still unsure as I type but… here I am…

As you all know, I spend a decent amount of time watching streamers… okay I’m lying… I spend an enormous amount of time watching streamers. Mostly because I love games, the people I watch are funny and I can’t play as much as I want to so I’m living vicariously through them. 

I, like most viewers, spend most of my time in my favorite streamer’s chats and occasionally browse for new content creators. One morning I decided to pop into a stream that I hadn’t been in for a long time. Unfortunately, I wish I had kept it that way.

She was going on a rant about Black Lives Matter being over the top for requesting that Robert Downey Jr apologize for wearing black face in the move Tropic Thunder. Her main argument… it’s just a movie.

Honestly I don’t even remember that being an actual Black Lives Matter talking point. I think she just blended BLM with Robert Downey Jr and just ran with it.

Now I’m almost positive that there is more to this story. What the more is…. I don’t know and frankly I don’t care… I left her stream shortly after her remarks and facial expressions and never went back.

I think I was just shocked that she said that with her full melanin deficient chest.

Thinking back, as I child, I had a similar thought process. I would watch shows like MAD Tv, In Living Color, SNL etc. And whenever someone dressed up and made fun of another culture I found it hilarious. I wasn’t cognizant to the cultural significance, ignorance and demeaning nature of those jokes. In my mind…. it was just a joke…it was just a movie…it was just a skit. No big deal right???

WRONG!!!!!!

It didn’t take long for me to understand why certain skits weren’t funny to everyone and why they were and still are problematic. I grew up very sheltered and yet I figured out what was wrong… because I, like most decent human beings, developed empathetic compassion.

Educating myself on the racial slurs and stereotypes of my own people and how these tropes were used against us through propaganda and minstrel shows further solidified my cultural sensitivity.

As an adult I can easily articulate why characters like Ms. Swan from MAD Tv just weren’t really funny. I have no problems checking family members and friends alike. I make it known that some things aren’t okay and its as simple as that. It isn’t funny…

And its never just a movie or just a skit.

If that were the case then why are there soooooo many cartoons no longer in circulation? I mean, if its just a cartoon or just a skit then why can’t I find the original Looney Toons that I grew up with on mainstream television?

You know, the ones with Mammy, or the one when bugs bunny wore black face, or the one when bugs bunny pretends to be a slave and says “please don’t beat me Massa!” You know… those old school Saturday morning cartoons… before ONE SATURDAY MORNING was a thing in the 90s.

If you are not aware of Looney Toons horrifically racist past just YouTube it. You’ll find more than you bargained for… trust me

If it’s just a cartoon then why do we cringe when we get to “Everybody Wants To Be A Cat” in Aristocats? I mean come on… that Siamese cat singing with that accent while playing the piano with chopsticks is totally okay right? That was sarcasm

The sad thing about all of this is that in my experience most people who say “It’s just a skit” or “It’s just a movie” lack empathetic compassion. It’s not until it impacts them directly that they are willing to open their minds and accept that certain things are not okay.

And that is truly unfortunate. I can’t tell you how many people I’ve spoken to that fall into this category. For example, I once had a Supervisor, who was a person of color and they couldn’t understand why I thought it was important that my kids know the truth about black history and what has been done to us in this country. One day in particular I was talking about a Textbook that claimed that Black Americans migrated from Africa to America and willingly worked on plantations.

I was upset about the wording and explaining to my coworker (who I mentioned in my post Fighting The Good Fight) that this change in text negates what truly happened to my people, my ancestors. It was at this point my Supervisor jumped into our conversation and looked at me and said that the wording wasn’t a really big deal.

He honestly thought that since slavery was a long time ago (News Flash! Slavery didn’t end, it just goes by different name: Incarceration) and that changing the narrative from kidnapped and stolen to migrated didn’t warrant the issue that I was making it to be. Eventually, he began to talk about how poorly America has treated his home country and the devastation that it caused. He talked about how the American dollar severely devalued their own money to the point that they were forced to convert to the US dollar.

He talked about his country, a U.S. territory, and how glorious they were before American intervention.

Honestly I can’t remember what I said to get him to talk about his country this way… I was really good at my verbal Jujitsu back then…

I let him rant and complain and get it all out. And once he was done I said to him

“And you don’t want your children to know about this?”….

He paused and said

“You know what, you’re right.”

He finally understood why I thought (and still firmly believe) that it is important that my children and all children for that matter know the truth about slavery and the truth about our history in this country.

It’s just unfortunate that I had to help him remember his own frustration with his own history for him to understand why MY history was important. He is just an example of the many people that I have had to do this with. For some reason to them… its never a big deal until it impacts them directly.

As far as the aforementioned streamer is concerned, I haven’t checked back in with her in over a year. Why? I cant….

Mixer shut down.

But one thing is certain I truly hope she grew some compassion..

Because its never just a movie…